Wankers.

Wankers are people who masturbates. Wanker is an English word by the way, maybe not in the Oxford dictionary, but it is in my dictionary. In fact, it is the fourth most insulting word in the English language:

1. Saddam
2. Homework
3. Fuck
4. Wank

Wankers are a very interesting bunch of people. They are said to have no friends, no relatives and they do not have a PSP. Contrary to popular beliefs, wankers are said to have an IQ below 7. These are the top wankers on Earth:

1. Bill Gates (IQ: 4)
   
2. Vinod (IQ: 5)
   
3. Saloma (IQ: 2.345)
   
4. Britney spear (IQ: 1)
   
5. Taufik Batisah (IQ: negative 3.14, he got his name wrong.)

There are several ways to spot wankers:

1) They do this in class:


2) They seem to not be desperate. Their temptations are met and achieved at home, in their room, in front of the television behind the door. This is one of the reason why most of your friends cannot go out with you ... ...

You: Eh, are you free to go arcade and play?
Your friend: Oh, sorry, I'm doing my homework and I got to study, my mother does not allow me to go out anyway.
You: Please..
Your friend: [Disconnected tone]

3) Their palms are as smooth as silk. Read it again if you don't understand what I mean. You have to know what is wanking, the art behind wanking, and the history of wanking, oh wait, it should be in all the holy books you can find, it started with Adam and his wife, Saddam Hussein.

4) They do not feel anything when you show them a picture of a hunk or a disgusting picture. It is called desensitization, by the way.


5) Wankers have a very similar face to Taufik Batisah, our beloved and first Singapore Idol, who won because his fans are rich and can afford to pay hundreds of dollars to vote for him. Diagram: