Bald?

I don't understand why people want themselves to have no hair. As such, I went around asking others what their view on bald-ism is. There are many reasons why people are bald.

1) National Service

When men go to national service, they have to pull all their hair outs. This is done because of a number of reasons:

a) They will not be distracted by their hair

How will someone get distracted by their own hair? Their supposed hairstyle! If a guy have a mohawk for his regular hairstyle, his hands would be meddling with his hair most of the time, instead of reloading his SAR-21 or cooking his grenade. Imagine, during National Day 2008, a guy in the parade takes out his beret and start applying Gatsby Wax on his hair. The president would take out his gun and shoot him straight away.

b) Hair produces dandruff

Do you know why companies such as Gatsby and Onelook exists? And why they are not at a shut down point? The reason is: they produce dandruff and dandruff is contagious, thus many people buy their products, giving them profit.


This is a picture of a girl:


2) Britney Spears

Not long ago, Britney Spears, a girl, which is not a boy, was depressed. This made her go to a barber and she shaved almost all her hair out. Then, Britney Spears fan from all over the world shaved their hair to cosplay themselves to become Britney Spears. This is similar to people, mostly Japanese(who don't know how to cook), who dress themselves up to become a cartoon characters, such as Captain Underpants.


In case you don't know, Britney Spears is an actor. Her main role in acting is to act like a singer.

3) Adaptation

It is a must in some countries, such as Iraq and Israel to be bald. Why? Because hair traps air, and air is a bad conductor of heat, and thus, there is less heat exchange with the surrounding. (The previous sentence is currently one of the few facts presented in this blog.) And this is what they all hate. That is why they shave their head bald.


Bald heads reflects heat more effectively than heads with hair. This is because hair is black, and black surfaces absorbs heat more effectively than other colours.

Also, Gatsby do not sell wax to these countries. This means that the guys there cannot make beautiful hairstyles and so they just bald themselves.

4) For a cookie.


There are many more reasons. They will be posted up as soon as I make up another one.

Flat Earth.

I bet you guys expect everyone to know that the earth is round. You are in for a shock.

This is currently the most stupid theory EVER. The people in the forum believes that the Earth is flat. Seriously. They aren't joking. This means that if you move in a certain direction (in a straight line), you'll end up falling off the Earth. WHAT IF a student accidentally falls off the earth when he is having 2.4km run?


'Pon' refers to skip.

In order to cover up this flaw, the people in the forum thought of quite a surprising way of explaining why no one fell off the edge of the earth. There is a huge block of ice surrounding the earth, and the government from all over the world worked together, hired people to guard the ice.This prevents you from falling off the edge of the earth in your napfa test 2.4 km run.

Also, in order to explain gravity, gravity is explained as ' upward acceleration of the earth, approximately 10m/s^2. ' Which means the earth is constantly on the move upwards. If we consider this explanation, it means that the earth is currently moving faster than the speed of light already. This also means that rockets shouldn't be able to work and satellites are impossible, the entire NASA is nothing more than a conspiracy.

There's a reason why the sun is not a flaming chariot wheel. There are reasons why the earth is not flat. Thinking that the earth is flat is thinking that the earth is bigger than the sun, which is seriously what the people in the forum thinks.

So to sum it up all, flat earth looks something like this.


Ditch this bullshit. I hope nobody thinks that the Earth is flat after visiting the forum at http://theflatearthsociety.org.

Vulgarities.

(This post is ABOUT vulgarities. There will certainly be vulgarities here and there, don't worry, it will not be intended for you.)

(If you do not like vulgarities, do not read this post.)

Vulgarities are words that are insulting in anyway, or whatever you want it to be. I know that you know the meaning of it, so I won't explain the word any further.

There are many vulgarities in this planet, some of them includes:

1) Fuck
2) Bitch
3) Asshole
4) KNNCCB

Let us go through each and every one of the examples given.

1) Fuck

This is one of the most popular vulgarity in the world. Used by students, teachers, parents, businessmen and even grandmothers. Fuck literally means: To have sex. But most people use it either for fun or because they know that the other party will be insulted by the mere word itself.

One of the reasons why the word is insulting is because of the way one will pronounce it. There are actually a lot of steps to pronounce the word "fuck".

Step 1) Say "fffffff"

Step 2) Say "far"

Step 3) Say "ark"

THREE steps is needed to say one word. This shows that people who use vulgarities are very fit and are able to speak very well in front of an audience.

This is an example on how to use the word "fuck":



2) Bitch

"Bitch" usually refers to females. This is in accordance with my country's law, stating:

"Section 1.77 of the Penal Code:

Any person stepping on this land will be liable to 5 days imprisonment if caught insulting a woman with the word "bitch". If he jumped before saying "bitch", then he will be innocent as he is not stepping on the land. Also, if he insult a man using the word "bitch", he will be told to use the word "gay", instead of "bitch"."

Here are a few pictures of well-known "bitches" all over the world:


Based on my experiences with my friends, people call someone a "bitch" because the girl..

1) ...likes to flirt
2) ...acts cute
3) ...is ugly and takes picture of herself like a superstar

The word will usually result in a cat fight; a fight between two girls.

--------------------------------------------

"Asshole" and "KNNCCB" will be written in the next part of this post.

Thank you.

Scientific Questions Answered* (Part 2)

(I guess that after reading this and the part before this, most of you will be brainwashed and all of you will fail your science test.)

The world works based on a set of formulas, a set of rules, a set of regulations from whichever you believe:

1) God
2) Nature in general
3) "It-is-like-that"

They are the ones who created the universe, but they don't want to let the world be in havoc, so? They make everything in the universe work in a set of rules, this makes the world more boring, at the same time, it makes Physics, Chemistry and Biology easier to be learnt.

So..

1) Why does the moon orbit around the Earth?

This is a very tough question, I guess. After a few hours of brain-cracking and viewing clips after clips of the moon rotating, I found the answer.

Do you watch soccer? Of course, everyone on Earth watched soccer. Watching David Beckham doing a free kick towards the goal, I watched the ball spinning on its own axis. Then, I zoomed out and saw the ball MOVING IN A CURVE! From there, I watch the moon spinning and saw the similarity. So, the answer to the question above it:

"The moon orbits around Earth because it spins like a soccer ball and moves in a curve."


2) I seem to have Menstruation once every month, what is it and how do I prevent the disease from coming back?

Menstruation is a disease spread by the aedes mosquito. Germs enter your bloodstream and eat up the veins, this will cause blood to gush out. The blood will then exit from your body via open holes.


All males are immune to this disease.

To prevent this disease, scientist have invented a device to stop the mosquitoes from biting you. The device is called KOTEX. Just wrapped the device around the areas infected and everything should be fine. This disease is so widespread that there are a lot of toilets who have proper bins for the disposal of these devices.

3) Are pimples bad?

Yes. They are bad.


To remove them, use your fingernails and scratch your face until the pimples are gone.

Pimples are an indication of chicken pox. If the pimples start to appear on your body, it is a confirmed case of chicken pox. Visit your nearest doctor and shout at his ears for help.

Friendster.

"Give me comment derh.."

"Add me worhz!"

"Your are my best friend!(with glitter effects)"

"FASTEST , DUN WAN SEE LIAO !!! ADD ME !!! ADD ME LAH !!! PLS LAH !!! HEHE !0!! THANK YOU ADD ME LAH !!! I'M HAPPY U ADD ME !!! WAITTING FOR YOU !!!! ^^ LOL !!
GOT FREE ADD ME COMMENT!!
THXxx...^^V"

Have you ever seen similar messages before? Yes, you did(I answered the question for you). Messages like these appear everywhere in friendster.com, a place where friends can connect, share images, tell others about their lives, etc, etc, etc.

But it is also a place where people strive to be "popular"; a person with many "friends" and comments/testimonials. They think that having many so-called friends will make them seem popular, but I disagree. People add them just because they are pretty(very pretty), and they have a "private profile". Which means that the guys will have to add them just to see their faces(over and over again).


Which leads me to another problem.

"Thanks for the add" is a popular exchange-sentence. They will say this when someone adds them, and so, the owner of the profile will say: Thanks for the add. Apart from the major English language error the question has, the sentence is a sign of desperation.


Adding other profiles is just a way to increase the number of "friends" they have in friendster. As there is a limit to the number of friends they have, they also make..

MULTIPLE ACCOUNTS!


Yes, people who have thousands of friends make multiple account for themselves. Good job! Now there are more galleries for me to view your photos! When I read their comments, all I see are Birthday greetings and "Care for intro" messages from guys. For the girls, they will say: "Friends forever". I disagree with the "friends forever" theory, this is because, everyone will die eventually.


There is also a much-abused system in friendster. And it is the bulletin board. Yes, it is full of spam and useless chain -bulletins; bulletins that is supposed to be "re-posted" again and again and again. I always avoid such areas in friendster.


I am not saying that friendster is bad or anything. It is just that many people abuse the system and thus making friendster a much littered place. If only everyone stick to the concept of design, then friendster would be an excellent place for everyone to "hang out".

Yeah.

Fashion.

Fashion sucks. Fashion is a communist movement. I'm pretty sure many of you don't know it, but in the years before the Tsar in Russia was actually overthrown by the people, 'fashion' wasn't a word. Fashion don't even exist then. Fashion is actually a communist idea. Living in a democratic country, many of us have been deceived.

Fashion's main purpose is to make everyone dress alike so as to represent equality in class. Even if you are rich, you'll look like someone who isn't rich. Blame Karl Marx for publishing his book and getting everyone influenced.


You go out in the streets, you see guys having hair like this. Furthermore, they have do not have a slope, fringe covering the eyes, side burn longer than half the ear length. Completely unacceptable. Take a closer look at the guy, and you'll know he's pro-communist.
(click on closer look) You see?


Almost every guy has unacceptable hairstyle nowadays.. People everywhere are getting used to the communist way of living.


The shop 'ThisFashion' originated from a communist. He is actually the grandson of Karl Marx. If you look carefully at the name ThisFashion, you would actually spot the communist sign.
Again. (click on 'Again')

The fact that fashion is just a way to make people get use to the communist lifestyle means most of the fashions suck. One example is the bell's bottom. This is because the designer have not put in much effort. However, people last time love bells. So they love bell bottoms. Definitely not because bell bottoms are nice.


The problem with bell bottoms is that the bottom is fat, but when it gets nearer to your waist, it gets very narrow. So who the hell is it for? Fat people can't wear it. Thin people look fat wearing it. Even 'pai kias' want to call gang and settle outside school because they are not happy with bell bottoms.

My point here is that Fashion is stupid. If everyone looks similar, no one would look good. So be unique. Don't be a slave to trends. You want to look good, don't trust fashion. Just wear what you think will be nice,(don't blame me if your taste sucks) and be proud of it.