The Arena.

Have you ever watched the channel 5 show: The Arena? I have, and I think it is a complete waste of time. Do you like watching students, almost the same age as you, talking like the Prime Minister of Singapore, and getting prizes? They are just making people think that it is an intelligent show while they sit there, shake legs and earn money.
This is the format of The Arena. First of all, they make a boring topic, such as "Bloggers are becoming more influential than journalists."
Secondly, they start talking cock, in front of the camera.


Then, the judges vote for the team that will make them earn more money.


Then, they will make another boring topic for next week, example: "If your mother died, would you blame your younger sister?." Then the whole thing starts again. The Arena are making students feel that they are politicians, able to make nuclear weapons and destroy the lives of innocent people through controversial cock-talking, and propaganda. They think that President Bush will listen to them, stop the "war on terror" and stop global warming. One of the few examples of these is Saddam Hussein. He won the 2003 The Arena and he moved to Iraq, and then tells everyone why he thinks that bloggers are more influential than journalist. A few weeks later, he was hanged. And, this is reality.

This is an extract from ''The Arena'' website:

Maria Mateen, 15

"I believe that I am a generic asshole who talks a lot against the conforms of normality which trespass the boundaries of one's personality. I wear braces because I have ugly teeth and my mother just died yesterday."

What are your other talents?

Talking cock, smiling at a wall, walking sideways, jumping off a building, going to The Arena and most importantly, visiting http://lifeaintsosimple.blogspot.com.

What am I supposed to do?

Too many things, too little time, as if. It is more like, too little things, too much time. I am practically bored to death at home, nothing to do. To add to my torture, there is heavy rain almost everyday. Why rain in Singapore? There is famine North Korea, dry Sahara or burning Indonesia to rain on. Why Singapore? Is Singapore a rain country? Is Rain singing in Singapore?

Oh wait. Let us all blame Rain.


Rain is a celebrity. He's quite cute, no kidding. But, he brings rain. Recently, he came to Singapore and there was flood everywhere in Malaysia, and heavy rain in singapore, till now. He also made a movie "blockbuster" with the title:

"I am a cyborg, but that's gay."*

And I don't understand the movie. He becomes a cyborg and everyone is like, "Omg, Rain is a cyborg?! But that is okay''. If i mutate into a cyborg, will you say that I am ok? Of course not. You would be running around telling everyone:

"LOOK! EnEn is a cyborg but that is not okay!"

The title of the show should be:

"I am a cyborg, but that is stupid, kill me."

This is more logical. If you see a cyborg, you would start calling SCDF, then, the SCDF will kill the cyborg, in this case, Rain (which will stop the heavy rain, which is good).

The reason the movie is a blockbuster is because Rain is featured. Which also means that most of the viewers of the movie are girls, desperate for a handsome boyfriend. They need help from Rain. They need answers to their questions. Examples:

"Are you really a cyborg?"

"Is it okay to be a cyborg?"

"Are cyborgs gay?"

So, that is it for today's junk.

I just used up about 15 minutes of my life writing it. Which is good, in a sense.

P/S: If you find this post insulting, especially those who are fans of Rain, be sure to read my disclaimer.

Boring drama shows.

Is your TV square or rectangle? Hopefully it is not round or oval. But that does not matter. Nowadays drama shows are getting boring. An example is shown below.

Both the guy and the girl loves each other deeply.

Guess what happened NEXT!!!

The girl left the boy for some kind of reason, like parents force or something. She waited for a bus.

Guess what happened NEXT!!!

The guy runs and coincidentally when the bus started moving off, the guy caught sight of the girl on the bus, screams her name and chases after the bus.

Guess what happened NEXT!!!

The girl will be seen crying, and the guy stops running and pant.

Guess what happened NEXT!!!

The guy turns behind and somehow, the girl is right in front of the guy. both of them got married and died in the end.

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I mean, where is the suspense? TV shows are getting more and more predictable nowadays such that people are getting tired of them. However, the example above isn't bad enough. There are worse drama shows. They are drama shows with no significant ending. As in shows of which two guys falls for a girl, and the girl has a hard time choosing 1 out of 2 of them. It all ends when the girl went to study abroad and the two guys left single and heartbroken.

Personally, these shows sucks. I would have regretted watching the show in the first place if I had known that the ending would be so shitty. Can't think of better endings? Then don't start the show! Isn't it simple? I watch the show because I'm interested to find out who the girl will choose!

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And finally, the shittiest of all. The 'VOTE FOR THIS ENDING' show.

If you want me to slap the director's face, sms 01 to 75143!
If you want the me to punch the director, sms 02 to 75143!

Why does these shows suck so much? Reason being that we, the audience gets to decide what ending the show will have. STUPID? 100%. This isn't a game, it's a show. A DRAMA. Get real. If I want to play a game, I would not choose to pay money on such a dumbass game.

Pen dealers and gaming addicts.

The pen dealers seem only to target young teenagers and all. They BELIEVE that $4 is a small amount. If they do, why the hell are they not donating it themselves. Beware people, they block your path till you not happy and want to kill them.

Morever they have this stuck-up attitude. Why on earth can't we NOT donate? And I'm not sure about this, they seem to change the price of the pen? The last time I went was like $2.00, today was $4.00?!?!? What the fuck. They might be profiting a whole deal from the *job*, or else they can't be that keen to sell pens you know.

And I hate profiteers who earn money out of other people's kind intentions, especially these kinds where you-don't-pay-you-don't-leave. Why should we help you when you give us stupid fuck attitude?
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Must I elaborate on these post? Yes, I must.
Online gaming, ADDICTS especially, will not learn much stuffs about their own computer + internet capabilities. But that is their problem, just make sure they don't complain.

I actually hate gaming addicts, especially MAPLE STORY ones. It steals Jeremy away from me. When I think of how they play, I really get pissed off. You see, example the online game is Maple Story. You train, level up, train, level up. You get so tensed up and keep on thinking "Tommorow I MUST level up, I want to fight BARLOG, you know." Ya, i know... ...you fight Barlog... ...AND? What? You get real cash? No right? By the way, congrats on killing the virtual hairy-bullshit who is a very strong virtual monster who kills virtual people.

I'm mentally attacking these addicts cause I know addicts won't sell their accounts, even when they do it's already worthless, as in very cheap already. "I want to level up today la! Wahlau! You so bad don't let me level up. 3.98% already you know! I HATE YOU!"

Fuck and go die. Get a life or just decompose as a corpse by the sea. Hopefully someone spots you, then say "I don't want report now, later then I report cause waste a lot of time, I can gain 3.39%." When reported, police also want to level up. When I say get a life, it does not mean getting a "1up" in game or whatsoever VIRTUAL life.

And by the way, are you ACTUALLY having fun living in a virtual world and then when people kill monsters which you are killing, you tend to 'take revenge'? You feel nice? If no, why you play? Not for fun definitely... ... or because you want to live inside the game? After you die, a grave drops down then you float in circular motions consistently around it, revolving till you click 'OK'.

Look at the image. I conclude that the player is an addict. He must be sooo exhilarated when he defeat the "pieces of brick joint together" to form a brick monster that he actually took a screenshot and published it on the net, which is how I got the picture. HE defeat it, he is the character in the game. Surprisingly, the brick monster drops much VIRTUAL coins and items.

And even more, what the fuck is this?

Watch this!

OMG. Sooooo touching... ...look at their beautiful faces... ...completely fake and all... ...they love each other so much, that their whole love life was in an online game called Maple Story. Oh, how touching. It's so sweet you know, kissing virtually, watching how they protect each other and stuff. Never once stopped to realize how stupid they seem.

"I love you, thus I shall marry you... ... ... ... ... ...in Maple Story. Will you marry me? Yes? Oh, I'm so touched..words CANNOT express my love to you. I shall now give you potions to heal your mana points to show my love to you."

Enough? What is with the song to go with that video? This is just a game, FACE IT. Never mind, go and play your crap games, BYE! Stay up all night and LEVEL UP!

P.A.R.E.N.T.S

Warning: This post is gonna cause some unhappiness and disputes among some adults or whoever. Always remember, this is just my PERSONAL OPINION.

What is wrong with some of the parents in Singapore these days? Over-protective?, or simply just having a ridiculously ''siding-with-my-child-is-the-best'' attitude? Obviously siding with your child is fine, but don't side until it's so damn freaking ridiculous.
For a start, if your child do something very wrong in school, some of you FORBIDS them to get punish. If they get punish, you freaking complain to the teacher, the principal, the school, and if all else fails, you go for government. Do all these stupid long processes just to protect your child from getting what they deserve, and of course, ridiculously... ...

An example of one ridiculous parent, below.

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Few days ago, i went Kopitiam to eat. Kieren, saw an empty seat and went for the seat to book it, a typical Singaporean style. Out of a sudden, a young child walks to the seat, looked at Kieren and sat on the same table, staring at Kieren the whole time.
I know what you all will say, that is we should have given the seat to the little boy, but don't you think that little boy have parents/guardians? If don't have why the hell he came to Kopitiam to eat, if he was without money.

Back to the story. Few minutes later, the mother came, and saw her son and my brother. She then proceeded to stare at Kieren, and then spoke to her child LOUDLY
"Oh, you want sit here ah? But got some selfish people sitting here already leh."

Fuck that freaking mother, not literally of course. She didn't even bother to find out what happened, still dare to say it so loudly. Kieren and I, as good citizens, did not cause trouble and just walked away. If it wasn't on account that the boy was still young, I would have scolded the shit out of them.

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So, what is wrong with the parents nowadays? You all think treating your child in this manner is good? You think they will learn from their mistakes? The answer is obvious, NO. So, the child will grow up, not having any experiences in life, soon wreaking and messing up their adult life. Do these parents just don't think, cannot think, or haven't thought about it?

No offence, but..

Following a text of atrocious bullshit, which are definitely offensive.

(Picture made by me)

If you are trying to be courteous, this blog is here to tell you that you aren't. Think about it. You are insulting someone and you do not mean to be offensive?

If you want to make the person you are talking to change, them tell them you mean to be offensive. Do not try to be such an idiot and say "No offense, (following words that really are offensive)." You are just trying to act like an angel aren't you? There are many other ways that you could tell them and not piss them off. An example is given.

"Please do not use "no offense" if you want me to change, but you are still my best friend.''

Isn't this simple? If you are able to take time reading my blog, I believe you have time to add in a few more words to what you say..that includes removal of the phrase "No offense..".

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Now, how should you react when someone uses that phrase against you? Simple. Scold him. Beat him. Do anything to the extent of killing him. Nah, kidding.

You could reply to them. On second thought, don't. They are "act-good people", and you hate them. Cover his mouth? No, it probably stinks. You should say

"SHUT UP!"

In most cases, they'll be pissed off and ask "What's wrong with you?", in which you reply, "Nothing, but there is something wrong with you. If you want to know what's wrong, visit http://lifeaintsosimple.blogspot.com and read her blog."

Self-esteem.

Tonight on http://lifeaintsosimple.blogspot.com, we shall learn about having enough self-esteem. As everyone knows, having enough self-esteem is extremely important. Having low self-esteem can lead to certain death, and this is no joke. You see, when a person have low-self esteem, the person tend to be sad more often, which will lead to depression, then suicidal. It is terribly sad when 1 dies of low-self esteem.

Fortunately, the http://lifeaintsosimple.blogspot.com team has found the perfect cure, and no, we are not joking. The answer to this major problem is yourself. Yes, it's true. Yhe answer is YOU. Find the truth within yourself, find your true self, and the problem is solved. How? Simple. Be sure that you are a good lie detector, so that when you lie to yourself, you can spot the lie and be true. If not, you need the lie-detector machine.

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What you will need:
1) A lot of money.
2) Local and US government permission.


Time required:
24hours - ~hours

Process:
E-mail a letter to the local and US government and wait for their reply. Place an article to state that you are buying a lie-detector machine for $50,000,000 SGD.

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Alternatively, you can obtain the machine this way too:

1) Great brain.
2) Speedy.
3) SWAT team under your control. (walk into the white house and ask for a loan from the president of USA)
4) 150 sets of M-16. (steal a couple of them from the Singapore Armed Forces and run away as fast as you can)
5) At least 10 anti-tank missiles. (walk into the white house and ask for a loan from the president of USA.)
6) At least 500 bombs (Loan from president of USA.)
7) good relationship with George Bush. (call George Bush and chit-chat with him often.)

Time required:
About a week

Process:
Know how to control your SWAT team. Next, instruct your men to rob a lie-detector machine and escape. When government finds out, police will come. Fire at will with the M-16s. When the country is under crisis, and when tanks are seen, use anti-tank missiles. Once the country is down, you will have to pay up for the equipments borrowed.

Sacrifice your SWAT team, convince them to be suicide bombers with your brilliant mind. Next spread out your SWAT team throughout the white house and wait for them to explode. Another one down.