Funny.

I saw this while surfing Friendster the other day.


It made me laugh for about 6 minutes! A girl wants a testis? Is she kidding me? Or not? Why am I asking so many questions in my own blog?

Okay, my point is:

Please write 'testimonial' instead of 'testis'.

It sounds better that way.

Anyway, study hard and do well for your end of year exams. (I don't say 'good luck' because I don't believe in luck.)

I am off now.

Scientific questions. Answered*

Many of us have asked yourselves about how the world works. Such questions challenge our minds to think and use our logic and sense to figure out why it happens. By not using mythical characters and unknown creatures that I have never ever seen before, I will be explaining on why certain things happen on Earth, or outer space.

1) What is gravity and why is there gravity?

Well, all of us know what is gravity. Gravity is the think that pulls us down towards the ground and such. But you are all very wrong. Never have I seen anyone as wrong as you. This is the real definition of gravity:


Gravity is the weight of the air above us PUSHING us down into the ground.

This is the visual explanation of Gravity.

As you can see, it is not a "pull" force, but it is a PUSH force by the weight of the air molecules. The Earth's gravity has nothing to do with gravity, the Earth's gravity's job is only to guide compasses to where North and South.

2) Why are there so much ice in the North and South poles?

Explained above, gravity acts on the North and the South pole of the Earth. As ice is a very magnetic substance, it is ATTRACTED towards the polar regions, thus, creating ice land masses at the poles. This has nothing to do with the angle at which sunlight hits Earth because, the only job the Sun currently has is to encourage global warming and kill millions of South Africans.


Do not believe those who tell you that the polar regions are cold because there is little infrared waves radiated towards the poles. THIS BELIEF IS NOT TRUE. The polar regions are cold because:

"There are a lot of ice there" - Wikipedia..

Ice makes other hotter things cold. Which comes to the next question..

3) Why is it that the temperature at the polar regions reach below 0 degrees Celsius?

This is because, like I said, ice makes things cold. The Theory of Cooling states that:

"The more ice you put into a body or substance, the colder it gets."

According to this theory, the polar regions are cold because there are a lot of ice there. Simple and easy. Almost like ABC. But not like 123, since 123 can be expanded into infinity, something I hate.

4) Why are we here?

Why are we here.. erm..

Humans exist only because of ONE REASON:












"SEX."

I will explain no further, I don't want to be sued by immature people who can't think like adults and such. Anyway, back to the topic. When we insert the thing into the thing, a CHEMICAL REACTION takes place. This is the illustration:


After about 9 months of reaction, it becomes a macromolecule, one big molecule. Once there is no other space in the "place of confinement", the molecule is ejected out of the "place of confinement" and is able to move around freely, making a lot of noise in the process. This is called "Birthday" in layman's term.

And that particular molecule.. Is one of us.

Assholes on public transports.

You know those inconsiderate assholes you get to see once in a while on a bus-ride last time? It has grown. Now, you can spot at least 1 per public transport ride you take.

I've taken the effort to type out each type of asshole that i deem an asshole which you can find on the regular public transport. Each group are distinctively different from another, and most distinct from non-assholes, so you'll instantly recognize them when you board the transport.

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1) Situation: The Urgent Dick head


Usually spotted when you are entering the bus, some random asshole will appear out from nowhere, and push everyone else away from the bus in the process to get up the bus as quickly as possible. It is as if they are competing who can get up the bus first. This is called the urgent dick head. The irony being that most of them aren't actually urgent, but still do it anyway.

They also frequently appear in the MRT station. It is especially irritating when you are unable to get out of the train because they barge in before you are able to get out. Yet despite all the aunties and uncles complaining about school kids causing inconvenience in public transports, they themselves are usually the dickheads.

Solution: Urgent Dick Head

There isn't any known solution for dick heads boarding the bus to me yet.

However, for those boarding the MRT, create a commotion so as to embarrass them. When they barge in, you can shout "Alamak, where is your courtesy?". For a better result, you can also add some stupid terms to make them move away such as "HOT! HOT! BOILING WATER!" or "SHIT! MY PENKNIFE!". A better way is to really hold a jug of boiling water and really bring a penknife to drop it. If it still doesn't work, do not just barge through unless you are certain that you will not injure anyone.

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2) The brittle man



A serious asshole usually found in MRTs. These people are not as common as the urgent dick heads, but more irritating, so as to compensate for their rare appearances.

Everyone hates the brittle man. I'm not talking about those that lies on empty poles ( That doesn't mean those aren't assholes. They still are, only that on a more minor scale). I'm talking about poles that people are holding onto. The brittle man will just lie on your hand regardless of anything.

Solution


Protrude your index and middle finger outwards.

Simple. But risks yourself getting beaten up, though the chances are still low considering you are on a PUBLIC TRANSPORT. Alternatively, you can wriggle your hand and move it up and down along the pole.

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3) The Fat ass



This particular asshole need not really be a fat ass. There are two types of this asshole. One doesn't know how to move in to empty spaces to enable people to board the bus, the other doesn't know how to lift his butt off the seat to let others out.

Solution:
No solution yet.

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Don't you just hate assholes? Yes, you do.

Chicken Essense sucks.

"OUR CHOICE."

Ever heard this very useless phrase before with a student smiling while holding a small bottle of chicken essence while smiling at you with a fully tucked in school uniform, hair with slope and neatly combed to the side? Yes. Behold, the chicken essence. It tastes like chicken and it smells like chicken but the difference is that it sucks while real chicken rocks.


How come EVERY top student drinks chicken essence. Isn't that like pure coincidence? Assuming that the chicken essence is a con from the producers, the top students are being paid a high amount of money so that their faces will be shown to the public while another editor writes: "OUR CHOICE." at the side. The advertising SEEMED to work, but it doesn't. It only shows that top students are show offs and that they should be killed. (but then, there would be ANOTHER top student, so we have to keep killing until there are no more students.)


If essence of chicken is so healthy, why isn't chicken healthy? Simple, there are artificial chemicals added to the essence, so it won't taste so bad and the vitamins are just crushed veggies. Protein comes from the chicken itself.

This is a quote from the BRAND's website:

"Question: Can each of my children consume a bottle of Essence of Chicken for Children EVERYDAY? I gave them a bottle every morning before school on weekdays and before tuition on weekends. I was told that giving them everyday will reduce the effect of keeping them alert as it should be given during stressful time like before the examination period. Is this true?

Answer: BRAND's Essence of Chicken is an unique high quality product manufactured by the latest technology under highly hygenic processing conditions. It is an all-natural health food supplement, made from fresh wholesome chicken and contains no fat, no cholesterol, no preservatives, no added msg, no stimulants, no artificial colouring and flavouring. It is also sugar free and low in sodium. BRAND'S Essence of Chicken is a food product and can be consumed daily and should not result in any side effects, withdrawals or addiction. In fact, it is scientifically proven to be efficacious if taken regularly. Scientific research conducted at more than ten universities indicates the BRAND'S Essence of Chicken can reduce fatigue, improve one's mental concentration/alertness and boost the immune system.

We recommend you to consume one bottle of BRAND'S Essence of Chicken daily. BRAND'S Essence of Chicken has been a longstanding and much loved product with a heritage of more than 170 years. Consumer health and well-being is our number one priority. As a product with scientifically proven health benefits, we are confident of the safety and efficacy of our products."

This is the supposed original one, but it was edited so that it would be more "consumer friendly":

"Question: Can each of my children consume a bottle of Essence of Chicken for Children EVERYDAY? I gave them a bottle every morning before school on weekdays and before tuition on weekends. I was told that giving them everyday will reduce the effect of keeping them alert as it should be given during stressful time like before the examination period. Is this true?

Answer: BRAND's Essence of Chicken is a cheap product and everyone can buy it. It is made by squeezing frozen chicken until the ice melts, the melted ice will contain the essence and this will be poured into a small bottle. It contains no fat. It will not make you fat... ... ...since you're already fat.

The product is a food product and can be consumed daily. It should not result in any side effects. If there are side effects, we will not be responsible. It is your own fault that you buy this product.

We recommend you one bottle every few minutes as this will maximize your son's and daughter's health. They may die if they do not consume the essence of chicken.

Essence of chicken may reduce fatigue, why? This is because your child is not exercising while drinking this piece of crap, so he won't feel tired.

To release stress, let us say, your mother died, then, drink chicken essence."

Worst drama in the world.

I suspect the Opera is an organization that is formed as a measure only to decrease a place's unemployment rate. I seriously cannot believe why people think that you need talent for Opera. It's not true. You need courage to perform something so stupid.

Everything about Opera sucks. They don't even make sense. The reason why they exist is for people to laugh at them. (Don't try to say no, I know most of you do) It is something like a comedy.

People in Opera are unable to move around without a drum beat and brass equipments.

First of all, everyone of you must understand that Opera is about exaggeration. They do 'the extra mile' for everything, except the narration.


Secondly, the way they move around. They do not know how to walk properly. Quite often, you will only see their lower part of their body move, with their upper part of the body keeping still with arms in such a manner that people don't quite understand. Who the hell walks in that manner.


The worst thing is their narration in English. It totally sucks. It sounds as thought the narrator is picking out random English words like "he, power, strong, win, righteous, martial arts, great, evil, die". These words are a must for Opera Narration. It goes something like this:

Narrator: He strong.
*Performer dances for 15minutes*
Narrator:Great martial arts, righteous.
*Performer wields weapon for 20 minutes*
Narrator: Evil die.
*Performer dance with another performer for another 10 minutes*
Narrator: Win righteous evil he martial arts strong great die power.
*The performer acting as the evil guy suddenly collapses with the sound of drum beats and brass equipments being played. The process of collapsing takes another 15 minutes.*
Show ends.

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Yet, there are still positive things that you can gain after joining the Opera. You will be able to spin well. Trust me. I've seen an opera performance before, I swear I saw them spin at least 50 times. They spin just about everything they can think of:

Their heads
Their entire body
Their weapons(supposed to be fighting but they just spin the weapons and the opponent falls. So no point on fighting)
Their hands

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No drama is worse.

Pokemon Vs Digimon: The Series Part 1

Pokemon and Digimon..


These are the two Japanese-made cartoons that have "mon" in their names. Both cartoons display monsters fighting each other with a "trainer" to achieve something. Nevertheless, they have a similarity, they both suck. But let us put that aside and look at the good stuffs:

The good/bad stuffs about Pokemon:

1) Their language is the easiest to learn. By stringing their names together and repeating it with different tones, beats and pitches, they will be able to communicate verbally. Example:

Pikachu's name is pikachu. Her language is:

"Pi..KA, CHU! Pika..pika..chu! Chu pi ka pi ka pi pi pi kakaka chu chu pi ka chu pi pi."


I find this concept very stupid. The Pokemon will say, shout, whisper the same thing, even when its fighting. This is by far the lamest thing on Earth.

2) They have innovative names for their Pokemon games. The names are influenced by colours, and beautiful gems, but don't get tricked, the gems represents a colour. The creators obviously think we are stupid, but we are not.

These are some of the names:

Pokemon Blue, Red, Yellow, Green
Pokemon Sapphire, Ruby

When they didn't have any other names or when they simply are too lazy or such, they add an adjective behind the colour:

Pokemon FIRERed and LEAFGreen. (WOW! SO innovative!)


The next few games for the Pokemon series will have a more complicated colour:

"Pokemon Dark and Dirty Camouflage Navy Green."

3) THEY WILL NEVER DIE! This is the BEST THING IN POKEMON.

Yes, a Pokemon, after being run over by a truck, smashed onto a wall by Mewtwo, cut into half by a chainsaw, will simply FAINT. It will not die. It will never die, at least, in the show. This is because, Television producers from Mediacorp, who are gay and have pampered children, cannot stand watching their children watch living things DIE. They think that it is a very violent thing.


Tune in for the next Part 2 for the Digimon side! And eventually, the ultimate conclusion in part 3.

Martial Arts.

Martial Arts is a compilation of different various actions such as rolling, kicking a ball, bouncing a ball, squatting down, performing sexual intercourse; and then animated to be used as a form of self defense; then to be lost again generations after generations as each master keeps a good technique to themselves even when they die for fear of being attacked by the disciple.

The more common martial arts we know of includes Tae Kwon Do, while the not so commonly heard of includes Ninja Do.

In the past, people often use martial arts for these various reasons:

1) To force sex.
2) To protect the Emperor and oneself.
3) To fight to distinguish the better one.
4) To assassinate and ascend the throne later on.

Now, people often use martial arts for these reasons:

1) To lure girls and trick them into sex.
2) To protect your stead.
3) To take part in competitions that stops almost as soon as it started to distinguish the better one.
4) To assassinate and get hanged later on.

Here are different types of unique Martial Arts:

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Karate

Karate is a type of martial arts that involves you to slam your palm hard onto something hard so that the object will break but more often the object breaks your hand. Karate is said to be the key source of idea for the invention of a hand axe.

Ninjitsu

A form of martial art that trains you to throw knifes and shurikens at people, and stay camouflaged. It also teaches you how to shut up while you move along an area so that you will not be heard, but seen anyway. The only way to keep you hidden is to perform it during the night, where light is at its minimal, yet you'll wake everyone up due to the noise you make and get spotted anyway.

Tai Chi

Tai Chi is a unique form of martial art that promises you to have ultimate power by making you move extremely slow for many years, yet by the time you actually manage to gain the power, you are already near to the end of your life. Tai Chi is actually equivalent to standing still, only faster.

How subjects taught in school benefit us: Physics

Physics..

The basis of all sciences. Everything depends on physics. Something moves..that, is physics. A molecule launched into space with a rocket booster with plural engine using emulsified and co-radiation nuclear fuel with 32-bit diode spin with an electron transverse wave in the center..that, is physics. I know you don't understand the previous sentence. The reason being, it is a "physics" sentence. Therefore, I conclude that,

"Physics is the complication of an English sentence, whereby only a relatively small number of people understand." - EnEn, copyrights 2007.




Why do I say so? Here is an example of the application of physics.

English: The ball was thrown upwards and slowed down till it seemed to hover on air for an instant and it started falling.

Physics: An object, preferably a ball, was given 41N of thrust upwards, and, taking up as positive and down as negative, it moves in constant deceleration, eventually, reached zero velocity but with the Earth's constant gravitational pull that pulls any object at 9.807 m per second per second, the ball starting accelerating downwards.

Back to the point. So how does physics benefit us? These are some of the benefits:

1) When you do not have enough words to complete an essay, use physics.

"... ... ...He dropped the bottle. Jane frowned. Her fluctuating emotions was revealed in her wrinkles on her face, as deep as a trench. Gravity is a phenomena where all objects with mass attract each other. Michael was not amused. He was angry, not entertained. Jane did not perform to expectation. Gravity is needed to keep us on the ground. He took his gun and put a bullet through Jane's head. Gravity pulled Jane's body towards its center... ... ..."

I think I have explained my point.

2) You can "know the future".

Using physics diagrams and such, you can know what will happen next without the need of Iris. Here is an example:

A train is speeding towards you and you are standing in the middle of the track. The driver is sleeping and no one is driving the train. After three seconds, the train is 3 centimeters away from you. Will the train hit you?

With physics, you can safely say "yes!".




Erm? Right. That is how useful physics is.

Food variety programmes.

Never trust Food variety programmes unless you have tried the food yourself because all food variety programmes give stupid shitty comments about food products that nobody in the world actually care.

Usually, food that is rated full marks by these programmes just taste okay. They aren't really anything special or what. It's what the media do. They overrate the food. They use words like 'excellent, marvelous, gorgeous, delicious, fantastic, unexpected' for almost all their recommendations. This is what they do: They hire a well known celebrity to try the food even though they should have used a well known chef.

-----------------------------------------------------------
Celebrity: Look at the beautiful lit shop! I bet the food is good!
Celebrity: Gosh look at the crowd!
*Join the queue. Serve celebrity.*
Celebrity: Uncle, which of your food is nice?

(Note: This is an extremely stupid question because if the uncle owns the shop, The uncle won't ever admit that they sell food that isn't nice, because that will reduce the number of people who visits his shop. The answer will inevitably be "All of my food tastes great!" or something like that, so..)

Uncle: All of my food tastes great!
Celebrity: I see. I'll have a go on the mutton BIRyani!

*Next scene, Celebrity seated with mutton biryani, most probably overloaded with mutton so that you will think that you'll get the same amount of mutton when you buy it. Not true.*

Celebrity: Mmhh!! Look at the color of the food! Just by looking at it, I love it already!
Celebrity: The mutton looks so glossy in the curry!
Celebrity: Let me have a try on the food.

*Eats the food. Give out a gasp, but SOMEHOW the celebrity manage NOT to choke on the gasp even though his/her mouth is stuffed full with the biryani. Fake gasp, for effect only.*

..
Celebrity: Oh my god, it tastes good!
Celebrity: The taste of the curry with the mutton, makes the mutton taste just great!
Celebrity: You can feel your teeth sinking slowly first into the hot and spicy curry sauce, then the mutton!
Celebrity: The rice is great too! Nicely cooked, Not too soft or hard. You can really feel each grain of delicious rice in your mouth as you bite them!
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Do you think there's nothing wrong with the text? If so it's okay. But there's almost all of those text are useless. Look again. The useless text are highlighted in green, while comments made by me is in orange.

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Celebrity: Look at the beautiful lit shop! I bet the food is good!
Celebrity: Gosh look at the crowd!
Celebrity: Uncle, which of your food is nice?
Uncle: All of my food tastes great!
Celebrity: I see. I'll have a go on the mutton biryani!
Celebrity: Mmhh!! Look at the color of the food! Just by looking at it, I love it already!
Celebrity: The mutton looks so glossy in the curry!
Celebrity: Let me have a try on the food.
..
Celebrity: Oh my god, it tastes good!
Celebrity: The taste of the curry with the mutton, makes the mutton taste just great!
(Please note that the celebrity is actually just describing ANY regular mutton curry.)
Celebrity: You can feel your teeth sinking slowly first into the hot and spicy curry sauce, then the mutton!
(Note: Everyone with a sense of touch can do that.)
Celebrity: The rice is great too! Nicely cooked, Not too soft or hard. You can really feel each grain of delicious rice in your mouth as you bite them!
(Note: The celebrity is just describing COOKED [not burnt or undercooked] rice.)

7 words out of 140 words are useful (2percent)

Vanessa Hudgens is a porn star?!

(This post may sound rude at times. Sorry.)

High school musical..

What a great show. This show is about people who try to sing and ACTUALLY got successful. They overcome boundaries after boundaries, such as people telling them that singing is not what they should do. And they are right.

Sitting at KFC, Janson lent me his Newpaper (today). I looked at the cover page and I was shocked. A picture of Vanessa Hudgens..nude. And of course, the newspaper editors censored the picture, obviously. You would be asking me what had happened to her. Good, I will answer that question.


She took a nude photo that appears to have been taken in a bedroom or an on-set production trailer. Standing and pulling her hair back with one hand, she shares the frame with a bed, a wooden dresser, the carpet, the table, the chair, the hair, the vase, but not the shirt, the bra, the pants.

This is what she said to reporters:

"I want to apologize to my fans, whose support and trust means the world to me,"

"I am embarrassed over this situation and regret having ever taken these photos. I am thankful for the support of my family and friends."

This is what she really meant:

"You all very irritating leh, I do small stuffs like that also cannot. But continue supporting me, this is my full-time job."

------------

"Vanessa has apologized for what was obviously a lapse in judgment. We hope she's learned a valuable lesson."

This is what she probably said to the reporter:

"I will never be naked ever in my life. When I bath, I bath with a T-shirt, pants and a cap. I will cover my body with mud and will never take a picture of myself. No one will ever see me again. I will walk around fully covered. This way, I will never be called a porn star."

This is the reason why you should not like any celebrity. Anyway, a celebrity does not mean "someone that celebrates". ALL celebrities drive while they are drunk. They also like to take drugs and smoke. They also like to give themselves stupid names. These are two of the most stupid names ever.

1st stupid name: 50 Cent.


His real name is Curtis James Jackson the third. His fake name, 50 cent, makes him cheap. This is the most un-unique name ever. And his name is also irritating, it makes a conversation very difficult to be carried on.

EnEn: Eh, I don't have enough money.
Guy: Oh, what do you suggest?
EnEn: Can you lend me 50 cent?
Guy: Huh? Don't be stupid, he is having a concert at Atlanta and you're asking me to call him and tell him to take a plane HERE? Stupid.
EnEn: No, as in, half a Singapore dollar.
Guy: Then say so!
EnEn: I did.

2nd stupid name: Akon, pronounced as air-con.

His real name is actually more funny than his nick name:

"Aliaune Damala Bouga Time Puru Nacka Lu Lu Lu Badara Akon Thiam"


For him, it is good that he got "Akon" as his name, because his name would destroy the teachers mouth. Imagine..

Teacher: Everybody, sit down, I want to take attendance. Err, who is this?
Akon: Is it Aliaune Damala Bouga Time Puru Nacka Lu Lu Lu Badara Akon Thiam?
Teacher: Yeah, how am I going to pronounce your name?
Akon: Aliaune Damala Bouga Time Puru Nacka Lu Lu Lu Badara Akon Thiam.

See?


Bibliography:
Link

TV shows that have a bloody wrong title.

In this post of mine, I am going to write out what I feel about the TV stuffs that have wrong titles, or those that can be better.

1) Diva on a Dime (show)

This show should be renamed: "I don't have enough money to buy nice clothes, so I asked cheap-skate professionals to buy me some cheap-skate clothes."

This show is usually shown in TVMobile because TVMobile do not have the required money to buy quality shows. They show you a girl or a boy, that do not have enough money to buy expensive and nice clothes, buying CHEAP clothes and a barber cutting their hair nicely (so that if the cheap clothes are ugly, at least the hair will neutralize the ugliness).


2) World's Funniest Animals (show)

This show should be renamed: "I make fun of animals doing silly stuffs, so that the audience will laugh if the video is not funny."

This show is shown in a lot of channels, but they repeat this show for about 1 MILLION times on TVMobile, even youtube.com will lose to this channel. It is always about the lame jokes the narrator say that makes the show funny. If you mute your TV, you WON'T laugh, if you laugh, your cousin is probably tickling you on your hips.


3) MTV [Music Television] (channel)

This channel should be renamed: "I advertise celebrities that is so unpopular and I make them popular, and then, I give them awards such as the Best Artist Award LIVE on television, so that they will pay me more money, if they don't pay me enough money, I will criticize them on Punk'd and make funny jokes about them, sometimes, I will ask Eminem to rap and insult them, if they still don't pay, they will be killed in a car accident."

I think that the title I proposed for them will explain what I was supposed to type down here.

Inventions.

Technology has constantly been improving. Inventions are constantly being made everyday. Inventions that most of us heard of benefits us in lots of ways. These are inventions like light bulb, computers, cellphones. Who the hell doesn't have them. Of course, at the same time, stupid inventions are also being made.

Top 3 useless inventions.

The solar-powered torchlight

This invention may sound high-tech, but in fact, it's actually useless.

Tom: Oh shit, i lost my pen underneath this cupboard!
Mum: Shine the torchlight dear.
Tom: I can't.
Mum: Why not?
Tom: It's at night.
Mum: And?
Tom: The torch won't work as there aren't enough energy!
Mum: Wait for tomorrow morning then.
Tom: I don't need a torch in the daytime.
Mum: ... You don't be rude to your mum now, Tom.

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Battery-charger

Alright, battery-chargers aren't exactly useless. Since you pay electricity bills to charge up your batteries which is required for your equipments. At least some equipments are only battery-operated, which makes the battery-charger useful. Or maybe, just maybe, you can BUY more batteries.

The worse thing is, you actually use a battery-operated battery charger.

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Segway

First of all its way too costly. The main purpose of the segway is to transport human. Yep. Like many other inventions, the segway boast about these little chips and micro processors that nobody really cares. The amazing thing about the segway is that it can balance itself on two wheels (which made it super costly).

One reason not to buy the segway is that you can just add an extra wheel for it to balance, and save thousands of dollars for other items. The other reason is that you don't actually need a segway, since it travels only around 20km per hour. Who needs that kind of transport? If you are travelling long distances, buy a car. If you are travelling short distances, i propose a good idea. You walk.

Sony vs Microsoft [P2]

Please read Part 1 of this series first. It can be found at the navigation column on the right side of this blog.

Sony had just revealed their new creation, the PSP Slim and LITE! The new PSP will be 33% lighter (reduced to 189 grams from 280 grams) and 19% slimmer than the original PSP system. It even have TV input in case the screen is too small and you need it to be 10 times bigger to see. A happy Akio Morita, the founder of Sony, sits on his chair and laughs at Microsoft.

"There would be less strong competition," he says.

"This is complete crap." - replied Microsoft.

An angry Bill Gates slams his table. Frustrated, he threw his wireless Xbox 360 controller to the floor, but it didn't break, because it is very durable. He started throwing darts at logos of Sony, which is just bold letters that can be typed by anyone. So, he made this:


Microsoft has just invented their New Xbox 360 portable! This is a revolutionary idea by Bill Gates. His idea? Make the Xbox 360 portable! This is how you can do it:

This is life. Competitions are everywhere. This is when Nintendo DS comes in! With their NEW Nintendo Wii! This is a revolutionary idea by some guy in Nintendo that said this:






"How about, we don't use buttons? We use the movement and the elegance of the controller to give input to the console?" - some guy from Nintendo.

So they created the Nintendo Wii! You all should very well know how a Wii works right? Good, so I won't waste my bandwidth then. This is how you throw a grenade in Call of Duty, a first person shooter game on a Nintendo Wii:


Sony seems to be angry, so, they created their crappy and useless SIXAXIS controller! Which is a controller that looks almost identical to the current PS controller but have sensors that can sense where and how the controller is being carried, just like the Nintendo controller! This time Bill Gates really did something incredible..

Stat tuned to find out.